Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
