I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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