I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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