I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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