she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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