yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Randomize