when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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