Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
i came on her dog
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
