if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Randomize