Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
After last night, I could never be a politician.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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