Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
