how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Randomize
