just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
It's official drugs can't kill me
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize
