I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
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