Umm I'm too high to move.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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