We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Randomize
