During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
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Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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