My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
