I'm eating all of the evidence.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Randomize
