If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize