Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Everything about him screamed your future.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize