i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
