I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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