I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
this must be what syphilis tastes like
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
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