you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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