Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Randomize
