I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
