I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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