your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
