remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize