but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
