this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize