Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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