we're blogging at a bar
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
So much rum. So many feels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize