you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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