You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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