The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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