My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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