I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Is it penis luge time yet?
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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