Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
