what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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