just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize
