the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
