I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Randomize