Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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