Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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