Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
