That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Randomize
