She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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