ADVERTISEMENT

• (913): View more from Kansas

  So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized

  Fav 53 5418 1340

  share tweet
  

• (419): View more from Ohio

  i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.

  Fav 16 3590 784

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea

  Fav 28 3891 1517

  share tweet
  

• (209): View more from California

  His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.

  Fav 15 1421 6862

  share tweet
  
• 

  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (651): View more from Minnesota

  I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me

  Fav 13 4710 1708

  share tweet
  

• (506): View more from New Brunswick

  I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.

  Fav 28 4766 1706

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (443): View more from Maryland

  the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20

  Fav 16 2150 3505

  share tweet
  

• (503): View more from Oregon

  just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care

  Fav 7 2716 1005

  share tweet
  

• (402): View more from Nebraska

  She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.

  Fav 4 2322 1200

  share tweet
  
• 

  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (330): View more from Ohio

  I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call

  Fav 10 2172 844

  share tweet
  

• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?

  Fav 8 2264 787

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing

  Fav 5 1256 700

  share tweet
  

• (309): View more from Illinois

  He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?

  Fav 5 720 2074

  share tweet
  

• (580): View more from Oklahoma

  I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.

  Fav 1 1169 615

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (609): View more from New Jersey

  Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"

  Fav 1 747 462

  share tweet
  

Randomize