For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize